Not knowing

It’s ok not to know…

So for the last 4 months I have been living in a lot of uncertainty of my future. I know it probably sounds a bit weird, but as a self-diagnosed control freak one of the biggest things I am sure I am meant to learn in this lifetime is trust and patience.

My standard pattern is to be super organised and know exactly what is happening going forward, so my diary is my life as everything is generally planned. But then around June it became very obvious and all my messages was pointing to the fact that I needed to back off all the planning and start trusting that all will be fine. So needless to say this was my mini version of hell unfolding, but deep inside I knew that I had to surrender, I knew that if I kept on going against that guidance that things would start unraveling in a big way. So I gave in and I decided to go with it.

I am about 4 months into this surrendering thing and all I can say is that I am rather calm, and things are working out in a big way.

I am still unsure as to where this is all going, but I am doing things, creating things but not pushing, not forcing. I am not putting any pressure on myself to know the plan for the next year and it actually feels pretty amazing.

So for now I am going with this, I am going with the feeling that sometimes it is okay not to know where all of this is heading.

Deep inside I know it will be worth it….

Much love



Photo Credit:  Rob Walker


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